Justin’s Opinion
I Love the Packers. We have the BEST quarterback
known in the league in Aaron Rodgers. (Discount Double Check
anyone?) I love the accuracy that Rodgers has as a player. He has a
way of throwing the ball in places where only his receivers can catch it, even
if that means throwing it out of bounds. Throwing it out of bounds in a
place where his receiver can catch no matter how difficult that may be.
He knows the limits of his receivers and the game, yet will push them both to
their respective limits in order to be victorious.
Intentional boundaries are so necessary, something that I
have learned in my time in ministry and in other public positions. It is necessary
that one sets boundaries. But, failures and successes came when I decided
that I would no longer dictate my life because of the safe confines of
boundaries. Boundaries are there to bless us, but there is a necessity to
push yourself to your limit never asking, “what if?”
In every walk of life, boundaries are there. Whether
it is the relationship you have with your parents, supervisor or loved ones,
boundaries are necessary. Articulating them and accurately figuring out
in a healthy way the edges that you and the other party have will facilitate
possibility and growth within the field you are playing in.
In
our relationship, we have articulated boundaries, some that we love, and
some that make the other uncomfortable. In the end, those boundaries are
build to build our relationship and bless us as a man and woman of God.
Courtney’s Opinion
Every time I think of boundaries, I always imagine a high
security gate with barbwire, high intensity electric wiring, and a sign with bold
words that read, “DO NOT TRESPASS” electrocuting all those who enter without
the right credentials. But why is this? One
of my favorite books by August Wilson is a play entitled “Fences.” In this play
he raises the question, were fences (boundaries) created to keep things out or to
keep things in? If you are anything like me, Boundaries sometimes meant that I
was missing out, pushing things away. However, as I began to embark on a
serious quest to know Christ more I realized this was not the case at all.
Those boundaries weren’t just keeping things out, but instead holding in the
values I cherish the most. That it was not at all a high security gate that
Tasers all who don’t meet my standards but more of a filter that provides
safety and encourages me to be. . . me.
I like to think that I am a spontaneous person that loves
living life on the edge but found that wasn’t the best way to approach life all
the time. As I work with many Young Adults in ministry the question we seem to
all ask is “How much can I get away with while still remaining in bounds.” As a
people we love to push it to the limit, which is a necessity sometime. However,
it is important that our focus doesn’t shift from enjoying where we are
currently to the boundary set or next the level outside of the boundary.
Like every lesson learned in my single season, this began to
vividly play out in my relationship with Justin. One major boundary that we
employ is abstinence. Many times it is
easy to highlight all the restrictions that come with this boundary, but
instead we choose to focus on the things we can share together. This not only
creates a stronger bond between us but also allows us to be grateful for each
stage and development of our relationship. Along with this boundary I learned
communication. As we honor this boundary in our relationship, I learned that my
communication was key. That I couldn’t just assume he could read my “DO NOT
TRESSPASS” sign that was written in invisible ink. Through this one specific
boundary, our relationship has matured to another level. Instead of feeling
like our relationship was lacking we have kept in the things we enjoy the most
about each other.
Our Opinion
It’s not about the boundary
or even pushing it to the limit. But it’s all about where you are. So embrace
them, cherish them, rest in them. Boundaries. To say that abstinence was an easy decision
for the both of us would be a lie. It is easy to let desires rule your emotions
and actions, but we have decided to allow them to allow us to cultivate our
relationship, understand the other and in the end truly know the other.
Whether
you push those boundaries to edge or live truly within them know that you only
get in trouble when you knowingly cross that innate line. As difficult as
it is, know that boundaries are built to bless us!
In God's Grace,
Justin and Courtney
#CJles
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